happy thanksgiving! :)

this is waaaayyy delayed, but i want every morning to start with me sitting by the lake, cup of coffee in had watching a meteor shower. it was beautiful!!!! wow. perfectly clear sky here. no tall buildings to block the view.

did i say wow?

the sky last night was why my favorite crayola crayon color is midnight blue. it looked like someone had colored the whole sky with it! the moon had an almost eerie orange yellow glow...maybe crayola needs a moon color...luna yellow?

i swear, my paychecks are harder to open than cd cases. in order to get my paycheck out of the envelope (which it is attached to) i must tear off the sides at the preforations, then open a glued-shut flap, then open another glued-shut flap, then tear another preforation to open it, finally tear one more preforation to get my check off. geez.

yesterday it was almost 80 degrees here. 3 days ago it was about 40 degrees out. odd. but, i had a carvel ice cream cone with rainbow sprinkles. they were my favorite growing up. it's been a LONG time since i have had one. yum. good thing it's 45 mins from my house, or i'd be there everyday!



i'm going to miss the sky when i leave here. :(

weird. my horoscope today...Embrace the changes in your life with open arms today, dear Taurus. It may be extremely difficult for you to let go of something in your life - especially something that you are very emotionally tied to. Realize that there are many forces urging you to change, and that the more you resist these forces, the more you are stunting your own growth. Instead of digging in your heels, kick them up in celebration and take off running to a new destination.

'celebrate we will, 'cause life is short but sweet for certain...'

"i'll be falling all about my own thing
and I know
you're the heaviest weight
when you're not here that's hung
around my head
and your lips burn wild
thrown from the face of a child
and in your eyes
the seeing of the greatest few
do what you will, always
walk where you like, your steps
do as you please, I'll back you up..." - dave matthews

"as I'm leaving
a change comes on my eyes
these streets persuading me
with mumbled strange goodbyes
and through the water
through the ring
to the soul of everything
throw my heart out on the stones
and I'm almost gone..." - david gray

funny, these two quotes came in debbie's dmb 'rhyme and reason' and both are feeling applicable now. i am feeling pretty overwhelemed by the thought of returning home, so i apologize for the lack of posts. i can't seem to focus on much else. i don't feel like working, though it's good because it forces me to focus on now, not the unpredictable then.

i want someone who will back me up, respect my independance...but are major changes required for that?

please, please someone tell me why they contine to try to make one of the easiest things in the world easier? how difficult is it to make a pb&j sandwich?

1. get bread out of cabinet
2. get peanut butter and jelly out of fridge
3. take out two slices of bread
4. using knife, spread peanut butter one one piece, jelly on the other
5. put two piece of bread together.

now we have frozen 'instant' (didn't it already just take an instant?)pb&j, pb&j kits, and the new!must have!buy now! pbslices. what will they think of next? a loaf of pb&j? (that'd be pb&j's swirled in white bread. crustless, of course. for the 'heathy' ones, there's a 'pretend it's more nutritious than white bread' whole wheat version. process of making frozen pb&j:

1. open freezer
2. dig through freezer-burned veggies, pints of ice cream, long forgotten leftovers, frozen dinners and bags of coffee finally discovering the package under a bag of a costco size package of frozen strawberries
2. tear of plastic wrap, which is almost as hard to open as new cd's
3. tear open cardboard box only to find more plastic
4. open plastic bag and take out one pb&j, pounding on the counter to get it unstuck from the other pb&js, breaking one in half in the process. put broken one back and keep good one
5. place on microwave safe plate
6. read instructions which say 'microwave for one minute, turn and mircowave for two more minutes. you have a carousel microwave, and wonder if it matters if you turn it.
7. place in microwave for 66 seconds. (cook, 66, start, because you're lazy and everything goes in for a repeated number: 111, 44, 33 etc.)
8. beep. take out and turn
9. cook, 222, start
10. take out of microwave, break in half and realize the center is still frozen
11. put back in microwave (cook, 44, start)
12. take out of microwave. see liquified jelly all over the plate
13, wait for it to cool
14. try to push the jelly back into sandwich and eat
15. spill still liquified jelly on favorite shirt
16. go to change and put stain remover on it
17. come back to find the jelly has taken on an odd consistancy and that the bread is now pink from jelly juice (it was strawberry)
18. pick it up to eat it again, take a bite as it falls apart in your hands
19. find that it tastes like kool aid mixed with a peanut-like flavoring with waterlogged white bread and decide to throw it away.
20. make pb&j the 'old fashioned' way

these pbslices seem to be packaged like cheese slices. ever try to peel thin plastic (of which you can never seem to find the opening) of slightly warm cheese slices? now imagine slightly warm peanut butter.

i can't believe they spend money producing products like this. even worse, their 'tag line' is 'the funner peanut butter'. great. teaching kids poor grammar.

think i'm going to have some coffee. no, not instant, not bottled coffee drink, real coffee. from those bean things, ya know?

PHISH!

in greensboro march 1! woo! i'm stoked.

i'm sick. bonnaroo style. couldn't get out of bed all day. couldn't even drink a sip of water. thankfully i still have the medication they gave me for nausea when i was at bonnaroo, but my head is still POUNDING. fuck. i hate being sick. i wish i knew what caused these mysterious 48 hour debilitatating stomach/head things. part of me wonders if it's somehow related to the giardia i had when i was on my NOLS trip...

i remembered one of the things i wanted to talk about...the sky! the sky here is gorgeous. i can't believe how many times it makes my jaw drop with its beauty. clouds like cotton candy, golden edges on puffy clouds, a vibrant sun. just beautiful.

the other day i was out running at dusk gawking at the sky and the light filtering through the trees. i came upon a stream and 3 deer - one just a baby. soon another one joined them. i stood there silently, watching them until they became aware of my presence and ran away into the woods.

wow.

a gorgeous sky, seeing deer, and saying hi to the cows in the pasture on the way home. how cool is that? :)

i know, i know, i've been slacking here. i have a lot to say, but it seems i forget it when i sit down at the computer. when i'm out running, i think of all these things...or when i am working...i think when i am busy (working 8am-10:30pm!!) my brain goes into hyperspeed trying to stay organized and get everything done, and i can't seem to focus. *sigh* hopefully i'll get something worthwhile here soon!

dmb in atlanta 12.11.02. i am SO happy. once again, keeping my fingers crossed for a say goodbye. only have one shot at it this tour...

happy birthday, mom. i miss you. i love you.

i'm building an ark. i can't believe it's raining AGAIN.

and when i moved here, everyone told me what a terrible drought they are having. yet, all it has done is rain!

rain, rain, rain down on me...again, and again, rain down on me....

i could rant about the current political landscape, but i think most of you who know me and/or read this know what i am going to say, so i'll spare y'all. i'm afraid. very afraid.

i got a pint of ben and jerry's for 64¢! woo! i still have a collection of $1 off coupons from the dmb shows this summer (i think i picked up at least 3 at every show i went to. :P ), but the b&j's selection in north carolina is terrible! no osw, phish food...but they did have chocolate brownie frozen yougurt at the store today (usually they only have cherry garcia froyo). they had karamel sutra, too, but i knew if i bought that the pint would be gone tonight. i have a terrible weakness for caramel. something about the gooey, sugary caramel...another reason why osw and phish food don't last more than 24 hours in my freezer!

it was on sale, and with my $1 coupon...64¢! mm. i love ice cream. good thing ben and jerry's is only sold in pints!

jack johnson was fun. the crowd was terrible. strange similarities to a 'typical' dave matthews band crowd. to illustrate this point, may i present three examples as evidence?

one:someone behind me screamed 'I LOVE YOU JACK!!' in an obnoxious voice
two: there was a college age abercrombie-wearing couple performing acts better left to private places in the row in front of me
three: a very dorky 'fan' next to me singing the WRONG lyrics, off key, and at the top of his lungs, commenting to his friend between every song 'oh, this is SO COOL'

adding to the entertainment was the 'best' dumb line i have ever heard at a concert (beating out what i overheard at a john mayer show last year: 'i really dig dave matthews - especially that song, you know, number 42?')

the guy next to me, after hearing the first verse of jack johnson covering 'stir it up', yelled 'wow! DAVE MATTHEWS!' then, a second later, 'oh! wait! BOB MARLEY!'

classic. duh.

but the crowd really was a bummer - especially after the trey show last week. *sigh*

that's ok - string cheese and keller williams on new year's eve! woo!

my life is like standing in front of a mirror with your eyes closed, only i don't know if i have eyes at all because i don't know how to open them and see if they are there or not. i walked to the greyhound station from the hostel and got on the next bus east, because all there is is east from californina, and it where wasn't what mattered, only where not. - thisbe nissen

the show was awesome.

asheville is awesome.

i'm ready to move. :)

had a great time driving there (the colors! so gorgeous! looked like a quilt of different colors. tried to take some pictures from the car window...i know, the probably didn't turn out, but, maybe they will...) met amy (from nancies) for lunch. after getting 'lost' for 30 minutes - i was in downtown asheville, the hotel i was meeting amy at (that i was staying at) was in downtown asheville, amy was in downtown asheville. but i couldn't seem to get from wherever i was downtown to the hotel. after calling amy 3 times and making many wrong turns, i ended up on the freeway. got off the freeway. back on the freeway. and finally found the hotel (and amy!)...what is it with me and east coast roads? geez.

after lunch i bummed around town, got coffee (great coffee shop, soymilk! delicious coffee cake), tried to rest...walked to the show. it was the first time i had gone to a show 'alone' - not meeting up with anyone i knew. i had a great time - danced like crazy, talked to some cool people (one who said phish was touring the west coast in february. woo! not that he knows, but just maybe...)

i have the worst head cold. ick. ick. ick. my ears, my throat, my head, coughing, sneezing...ok, i'm done complaining. :)

oh! the story...

at the center we have an element on the ropes course called the 'zip line'. it's a cable suspended from the treetops about 30 feet off the ground, about the length of a football field. the kid, in a harness, is attached to a pulley which is attached to the cable and the kid gets to 'zip' down the line.

there is a wooden block on the cable attached to a giant bungee cord which the 'catcher' uses to stop the kid. the kid then heads back up the cable (bounces kinda), the catcher then runs to the top of a wooden platform under the cable which is about 4 feet off the ground, pulls up a 6 foot metal ladder on top of the platform, grabs a carabiner attached to a rope, stops the kid, has them sit on the top step (yes, the one that says 'DO NOT SIT OR STAND' :) ), climb the ladder, unhook the two carabiners attaching the pulley to the kid, hook the other carabiner with the 'tow' rope attached to the pulley, tell the kid to climb 'carefully' down the ladder, then down the steps that lead up to the platform, take the end of the tow rope and run it back up to the beginning of the zip line, so the process can begin all over again.

whew. and, all of this happens in about a 2 minute time frame.

every other time i've worked the zip line, it's been with 5th graders. last week i had 8th graders.

160 pound 8th grade boys move A LOT faster then 80 pound 5th graders...the kid went by. i stopped him with the bungee cord. he bounced back up the line. i ran up on the platform, glanced up the cable and saw he went WAY back up and figured i had plenty of time to get the ladder up. as i was setting up the ladder, my back to the kid, i heard him yell. turned around in time for him to kick the ladder, kick me, sending the ladder flying off the platform and me flying in the air and landing in the mud puddle that was on the top of the platform.

the ladder broke in half. i feel like i am broken in half. poor kid had to hang on the line for 20 minutes while they got a new ladder. i thought my boss was going to kill me. fortunately, he apologized because he didn't tell me that with bigger kids you have to stop them THEN get the ladder.

oh.

so, i had to catch 11 more kids in sopping wet pants in 45 degree weather. i hurt. but, i laughed. becuase in a way it WAS comical - i would love to see a video of it. and i wasn't *really* hurt...and now i have a good story to tell. :)

i think i am going to hit the dmb show in atlanta. woo! but, i need a ticket, and the best i can do on ticketmaster is section 308. ugh! anyone know of someone with an extra a *little* closer??