today is an exciting day.

i have ontario license plates! i'm not sure why i find this so damn exciting, but i do. it somehow makes me feel more 'canadian'. haven't put them on yet, gotta wash my icky, salty car first. so, if you are in ontario and see a subaru with bumper stickers driving really slow in the snow, wave. it's probably me. :)

i'm going to bonnaroo!!! gonna turn 30 (holy shit, 30!) this year....kind of a birthday present. going VIP this year, though. gonna drive down. didn't want to deal with 10+ hour traffic jams, 45 minute walks to the campsite and getting stuck in the mud. i am SO SO SO VERY EXCITED. *does wild crazy dance* can't WAIT! :D

damnit...i wasn't going to go this year, but with dmb headlining, how can i not??!?

2005 BONNAROO CONFIRMED ARTISTS (many more to be announced):

Widespread Panic (2 shows) Dave Matthews Band The Allman Brothers Band Jack Johnson Alison Krauss & Union Station Modest Mouse Gov't Mule Bela Fleck Acoustic Trio The Mars Volta John Prine Yonder Mountain String Band My Morning Jacket Keller Williams STS9 Earl Scruggs & Friends Joss Stone O.A.R. Toots and the Maytals Umphrey's McGee

Iron & Wine Ozomatli Rilo Kiley Karl Denson's Tiny Universe Drive-By Truckers Particle Joanna Newsom Xavier Rudd Ray LaMontagne The Gourds Secret Machines Donna The Buffalo John Butler Trio Ollabelle Citizen Cope Brazilian Girls M. Ward Madeleine Peyroux

The road I've taken these five years has been a long and twisted one... - pam houston

what do you say to someone who knew you in the past, knew everything about you, many many years in the past, and appears out of the blue? it's suddenly as if those five years of growing are gone, and the insecurities and holes you thought you buried and covered up so carefully are suddenly exposed again. you reflect back on that path you took, asking questions, looking for answers, but somehow just feeling lost.

it's fine, i'm good, i'm happy.

it sounds almost like a defense of your self, and insistance that you did what you wanted to, that the path you took was the right one.

all while you wonder how you got here, and where that path came from anyway. somehow you had forgotten to look at a map.

hmm. interesting...

i've grown much more lax in writing here in recent months, but there are still many times when i'm glad it's still here. i think a couple people may still read....regardless, it's interesting to me, how this was here when i needed to type something...not for someone neccesarily to listen, but simply just to have spoken.

happy birthday, marcos! :) he's only 28. young kid.

i'd sing, but you really don't want me to. you know how painful that is. enjoy hogging the 'vortex'.

this is from this very blog, circa 2001. considering it's the 'statment' that i used to get into the outdoor education program here at queen's...and in light of some recent slightly whacky events in my life...it just feels write to have it posted here again...in part to remind myself why i'm here:

i don't know about all of you, i need this again:

follow your heart. think big.love open space. cherish your family. know that all children need love. plant trees. listen for the birds. cherish the land. save prairies, forests, wetlands, woods and streams. stop sprawl. preserve farmland. reserve habitat for wildlife. think small. one small planet. safeguard clean air and water. use alternative energy. recycle. take positive action. work for peace. promote harmony. create joy. love others. teach by example. see beauty around you. enjoy art. collect beautiful things. make mistakes. trust yourself.

i was living in a state of perpetual deja va | the ability to let that which does not matter truly slide | stop trying to control everything an just let go. - fight club

i need to sit down and watch that again. (alissa 11.06.01) --